Jamais Pur
by Gamma Orionis
Summary: The Black family is known for its purity, but its daughters do nothing to further that impression. Written for the lover100 challenge on livejournal. Various pairings, all involving one or more of the Black sisters. Chapter Five: Bellatrix/Lucius
1. Every Way There Is

Author's Notes: Written for the lover100 challenge on livejournal. This will eventually be a collection of 100 unconnected stories, all centred around pairings involving at least one of the Black sisters.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Title**: Every Way There Is  
**Author**: gamma_x_orionis  
**Fandom**: Harry Potter  
**Characters**: The Black sisters  
**Pairing**: Bellatrix/Narcissa  
**Genre**: Romance/Family/Smut  
**Table**: C  
**Prompt**: #001 – Author's Choice  
**Rating**: NC-17  
**Summary**: There's a difference between loving someone like a sister and loving them in every way there is.  
**Warnings**: Explicit sex, femmeslash, incest  
**Disclaimer**: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters in it, and I make no money from this.

"Do you love me, Cissy?"

Narcissa opened her eyes blearily. She had been almost asleep, and Bellatrix just _had_ to come wake her up…

"'Course I love you, Bella," she mumbled.

"How do you love me?"

She rubbed sleep from her eyes, shaking her head a little. The room she shared with her sister was dark, and Bellatrix, kneeling on the foot of the bed, looked quite eerie in the moonlight that filtered through the curtains.

"What do you mean?"

"_How_ do you love me?" Bellatrix repeated. "Do you love me like a sister, or do you love me in every way there is?"

Yawning, Narcissa shook her head. "I don't know… how can I tell?"

Bellatrix smiled slightly. The pale glow from outside made that little smile look almost sinister, and Narcissa found her heart pounding a little.

"Well," Bellatrix said slowly, "there is a way of telling… you see… there's something I can do to you, and if you don't like it, then you only love me like a sister, but if you do like it, then you love me in every way there is."

Narcissa shrugged a little. "All right, then. What are you going to do?"

The smile that had formerly seemed slightly sinister now looked downright wicked. Bellatrix stood up from the bed, hurrying to her own bedside table. She picked up her wand, then rifled around in her drawer, biting her lip.

"Ah, this'll do," she murmured at last, picking up something small and cylindrical. Squinting in the dark, Narcissa recognized it as a lipstick tube.

Returning to the bed, Bellatrix tapped her wand against the tube of lipstick, and it started vibrating. Narcissa shivered, looking at it warily. "What's that for?"

"Well…" Bellatrix's voice had turned from its usual tone to a strange, sensual purr, "I can't very well leave a proper vibrator lying around, so I have to do my best…"

Narcissa's heart fluttered. "What?"

"Shh…" Bellatrix leaned forward, gripped one of Narcissa's knees in each hand, and spread the younger girl's legs apart. Narcissa let out a little gasp and her legs automatically clamped together. "_What are you doing_?"

"Don't worry, Cissy," Bellatrix said impatiently. She leaned back, narrowing her eyes at her little sister. "Do you think I don't know what I'm doing? Because I do. So just relax and let me work."

Narcissa bit her lip, and reluctantly relaxed again. Her cheeks burned as Bellatrix's hands travelled up the insides of her thighs, lifting her nightdress, and her long fingers probed around between her legs.

"Good girl…"

The soft purr of Bellatrix's voice relaxed Narcissa slightly, but then she felt something cool and foreign slide inside her body. She cried out in shock, clenching around it.

"Relax!" Bellatrix commanded. She was still probing, and the cool thing was moving even deeper inside Narcissa, and she could feel it shaking and vibrating. Her heart almost stopped as she realized that Bellatrix had put the lipstick tube into her, and she squirmed nervously.

"I keep telling you to relax, dammit," snarled Bellatrix. She sat back again, and pulled her nightdress off over her head.

Narcissa's eyes fell automatically on her sister's breasts. They were so often concealed under the tight fabric of her corsets that Narcissa didn't think she had ever seen them loose before. And they were _big…_ bigger than she had thought they would be…

A tiny throb went through her. The lipstick tube vibrating inside her was starting to feel good…

Bellatrix noticed Narcissa's eyes on her chest, and she smirked. "Do you like my tits, Cissy?" she purred, cupping them in her hands. The words sounded strange in Bellatrix's mouth, but her mind seemed blurry and she couldn't quite register how strange it was.

Narcissa's hands moved automatically to her own chest. Bellatrix twisted her nipples between her fingers, and Narcissa copied her, pinching herself.

"That's a good girl," Bellatrix murmured. "Feels good, doesn't it?"

Narcissa nodded, squirming now. The pressure between her legs was growing and she felt moisture dripping out of her as the tube moved inside her.

"Here, Cissy…"

Bellatrix leaned over her little sister, pressing her breast against her sister's mouth. Her hand travelled down Narcissa's flat stomach to between her legs, and Narcissa jumped as a finger rubbed against her aching clit. The vibration inside her was becoming unbearably pleasurable, and Bellatrix's breast against her mouth, and her finger rubbing against the most sensitive part of her–

Narcissa let out a cry. Her back arched, her legs bent up until her knees were almost next to her ears and she writhed underneath her sister. Stars popped in front of her eyes. She was quite dizzy with ecstasy as she gasped for air.

At last, the feeling subsided, and Bellatrix pulled the lipstick tube back out of her.

"Nice, wasn't it?" she breathed.

Narcissa nodded helplessly.

"See," Bellatrix continued, "I wasn't lying when I said it was a good way tell how much you loved me. Don't you feel like you love me even more now than you did before? In every way you can?"

Again, Narcissa nodded helplessly. She _did_ love her sister in every way she could, and what her sister had just done to her only made her love her more.

"Good."

Bellatrix climbed out of the bed, and went to her own, turning over so her back was to Narcissa. Narcissa lay in her own bed, gazing at Bellatrix in the pale moonlight.

She tried not to think that Bellatrix had never said she loved her.

)O(

_Fin_


	2. So Sweet, Cissy

**Title**: So Sweet, Cissy  
**Pairing**: Andromeda/Narcissa  
**Genre**: Romance**  
Prompt**: #002 – Author's Choice. Also femslash100 Prompt #303 – "Sweet"  
**Rating**: PG  
**Summary**: _"You smell so sweet, Cissy…"_  
**Warnings**: Femmeslash, incest

)O(

"You smell so sweet, Cissy," Andromeda whispered, inhaling the perfume of her sister's hair.

Narcissa twined arms around Andromeda's neck. "I smell just the same as you."

"No, you don't," Andromeda told her. "You smell a hundred times as sweet as I do…"

Narcissa found herself smiling. She shook her hair back as Andromeda buried her nose in the pale locks, and then jumped when she felt the flat of Andromeda's tongue upon her sensitive throat.

Andromeda pulled back with a wicked smile.

"I thought," she murmured, "if you smelled so good, you'd taste even better… and I was right…"

)O(

_Fin_


	3. The Raven Himself is Hoarse

**Title**: The Raven Himself is Hoarse  
**Pairing**: Narcissa/?  
**Genre**: Romance/Tragedy  
**Prompt**: #003 – Author's Choice. Also for Thanatos Angelos Girl's 24 Hours of Romance Challenge on the HPFC forum  
**Rating**: PG  
**Summary**: Narcissa visits the grave of somebody that she used to love

)O(

The churchyard was cold.

Narcissa had gone to horrible trouble to be able to visit this place, and now, as she stood just outside the gates in the rain – too heavy to be called a mist or a drizzle and too sporadic to be called a downpour – she doubted herself. The cold permeated even the thick velvet and wool of her cloak, chilling her right to her bones, like something not of this world.

But she couldn't very well leave now.

The wrought-iron gate creaked loudly, an announcement of her presence that sent her heart skittering, and she looked around hurriedly to be sure that no one was observing her. To her relief, the only creatures present to witness her entrance into the dingy little graveyard were the ravens perched upon the creaking old branches of yew trees and the stone angels that looked upon Narcissa with pityingly pious eyes. Fat drops of rain trailed down their stone cheeks from eyes glazed with liquid. Narcissa had always been told that statues in the rain looked as though they were crying – it was hardly an original thought – but the way that the angels were carved, all billowing robes and half-stretched wings, with their hands folded at their breasts, made them look as though they had been turned to stone in the act of begging for mercy.

Narcissa shuddered and crossed herself, then started to walk slowly through the graveyard.

The smell of fresh, wet earth hung in the air – sweet and bitter and musty all at once – signifying that she was close to freshly turned ground. Good. That was what she wanted. That meant she was close.

She pushed aside the dripping leaves of a yew tree that obscured her line of sight, and nodded grimly. The picture framed between branches and angels was not unexpected – not even unwanted – but Narcissa felt her stomach knot up anyhow. Confident now that no one would see her, she lowered the hood of her cloak, cold biting air a relief against her skin as she stepped off the path to stand before the two newest graves.

"Hello," she said softly, staring at the smaller of the two patches of overturned ground, and then let out a short, sharp laugh.

"Bloody hell, I feel pathetic," she muttered, staring down at the freshly turned earth of the grave. "Talking to the dirt… it's not as if you can hear me now, is it? I mean… you're dead." She sighed, running her hand through her long, pale hair, soaked and matted from the rainwater now. "But, you know… I keep thinking… if I just wish for it enough, I'll wake up and it'll all be a dream.

A raven croaked from nearby. Narcissa dropped her head, toying with the edge of her cloak.

"I wish I'd been able to say this before," she murmured. "It's not fair that I only have the nerve to say it once you're dead… but…"

The raven was louder now, and more birds' voices joined in. Narcissa closed her eyes against the barrage of sound, her throat tightening, though she tried to swallow her tears.

_Look at yourself, Narcissa Black_, said a stern voice that smacked of Druella inside Narcissa's head. _In tears over a Mudblood. What kind of behaviour is this_?

"She wasn't just a Mudblood, though," Narcissa whispered out loud. She opened her eyes, looking down at the grave.

"I did love you, you know," she whispered. "I always did. I know that I said I didn't, but I lied… and I do… please forgive me…"

The ravens fell silent, and Narcissa took a deep breath, regaining control of herself. She forced her hands to stop trembling, tilted her head back so the cold rain could wash away her burning hot tears, then she forced a small, demure smile onto her lips and turned away, picking a path delicately between gravestones, and nevermore looked back upon Lily Potter's grave.

)O(

_Fin_


	4. Delicious

**Title**: Delicious  
**Pairing**: Narcissa/Rodolphus  
**Genre**: Romance/Smut  
**Prompt**: #004 – Author's Choice. Also for Day 1 of hp_may_madness – "Oral sex"  
**Rating**: NC-17  
**Summary**: There are some circumstances in which it is quite acceptable to give up all forms of dignity.

)O(

Narcissa's school blouse strained across her breast and her back arched while Rodolphus covered her in kisses. He had bound her wrists with two Slytherin ties to the posts of his bed, and all she could do was open her legs and moan for him.

"I love seeing you so worked up, Cissa…" he whispered, laying a soft kiss on her inner thigh.

"Please, Rod," she groaned. "Don't tease…"

'Oh, but you love being teased by me…"

Narcissa could hardly draw breath. He sat up and slowly set to unbuttoning her blouse with maddeningly slow, careful fingers. When she looked down over herself, she could see her nipples, standing erect beneath the white cotton of her bra.

"Rod, please, hurry, I'm begging you…"

He had moved up to her short grey school skirt now, lifting it with utmost care. Narcissa spread her legs as wide apart as they would go and felt Rodolphus's index finger trail slowly up her slit through her knickers.

"Just take them off, Rod!" she all but screamed, not caring that she might be heard by anyone who happened to be passing by the Slytherin boy's dormitory at the moment. "Please, for God's sake, do it now! You're driving me mad!"

His fingers hooked under the elastic, and she arched her hips off the bed as he dragged them down her legs.

"You smell so sweet, Cissa…"

"Mm…" she murmured incoherently.

"I wonder," he continued in a soft little voice, "if you'll taste as good…"

Then he buried his face between her legs, and Narcissa bit back a cry of sheer delight. Her whole body trembled as his tongue pushed deep inside her, and then he slowly raised his head and ran the tip around his lips.

"Yes," he said quietly. "Yes, you taste quite delicious."

)O(

_Fin_


	5. Past Secrets

**Title**: Past Secrets  
**Pairing**: Bellatrix/Lucius  
**Genre**: Romance/Angst  
**Prompt**: #005 – Author's Choice. Also for the h2H level of Lady Phoenix Fire Rose's One Hour Challenge/Hardest Challenge Ever with the pairing Lucius/Bellatrix and the prompts "I am getting married" and "past secrets".  
**Rating**: R  
**Summary**: Everything between Bellatrix and Lucius is a secret.

)O(

Bellatrix, Andromeda and Narcissa were sitting together in front of the Slytherin common room fire, in companionable silence. Most everyone had already gone to bed, for it was late in the evening, and they had the room to themselves. Narcissa was dozing lightly against Andromeda's shoulder, Andromeda was absorbed in her book, and Bellatrix was staring into the embers, slowly twisting her new engagement ring around and around her finger.

She had received it on the last day of summer – the summer before this, her last year of Hogwarts – and all through the year, she had not been able to stop touching it, for every time she did, she felt the tiniest and strangest swelling of hope in her heart that it might have disappeared since the last time she touched it. She could not _help_ but hope that, for to think otherwise broke her heart. It was even worse now, as the next summer approached and her wedding grew ever closer.

Rodolphus Lestrange was a good man, she had to keep reminding herself. He would not hurt her. He would not treat her the way her father treated her mother, or the way that plenty of other men would treat a girl like Bellatrix, who did not willingly bend to their whims.

But the very fact that he was a good man was frustrating.

Because Bellatrix was not a good girl.

Her parents had tried to convince her that she _was_ a good girl, really. That she just wasn't exercising discipline and that she would be much better if she could just learn to control herself.

But Bellatrix didn't _want_ to control herself. She didn't _want_ to be a good girl – and why would she? Narcissa was a good girl. Andromeda was a good girl. Surely her parents didn't really need her to be one as well.

That was how she tried to justify it to herself when she did things that she knew her parents would hate if they ever found out about them. She tried to tell herself that it was in her nature to behave this way and that it was foolish of her to waste her time trying to force herself into the ideal of propriety that they had forced into her. It was futile, she thought, because she would _never_ be that way.

But even if she thought that, even if she tried as hard as ever she could to convince herself of that, there was still a part of her, always a part of her that nagged at her when she drank or kissed boys (or girls, even worse) or did anything that her parents would disapprove of. It was a little part of her mind that spoke with Druella's voice and told her not to behave that way.

It told her that she would need to learn to control herself before she could be married.

But now she was going to be married and she _still_ hadn't learned to control herself. And she didn't want to – why would she? Control was for those who couldn't stand to face consequences. And she, Bellatrix, had no difficulty in facing whatever consequences the world saw fit to give her for her behaviour. It was what she willingly accepted in return for her freedom.

"Bella?" Andromeda said quietly, shutting her book and looking up at Bellatrix, who jumped a bit. She had sunk so far into her own thoughts, aware of nothing but the twisting of the ring around her finger, that it almost came as a surprise to hear someone speaking.

"What is it, Andi?" she said quietly. Narcissa stirred and Bellatrix raised a finger to her lips to indicate not to wake her. Andromeda moved Narcissa slightly so that her head was resting in her lap, then set her book aside.

"Why are you so unhappy about marrying Rodolphus?" she asked quietly.

Bellatrix shook her head automatically, immediately defensive. "I'm not unhappy. Rodolphus will be a very good husband–"

"Yes, I know that," Andromeda interrupted. "Of course he'll be a good husband. He's rich and weak and will let you do whatever you want – but you're not happy about marrying him."

Bellatrix's eyes narrowed. "You think you know more about my feelings than I do now?"

"Of course I don't think that." Andromeda was obviously fighting for patience and Bellatrix felt a rush of disgust for her silly, sanctimonious little sister.

"Well, then, what _do_ you think?" Bellatrix demanded. Narcissa opened her eyes and looked up to watch her sisters' argument with wide, curious eyes. Bellatrix glared at her and she flinched slightly.

"I think that you aren't very good at hiding your emotions," Andromeda said calmly, "and that I'll thank you not to act like the rest of us are so stupid that we won't be able to tell when you're upset."

"I'm _not–_"

"It's because she's in love," Narcissa piped up.

Bellatrix's eyes blazed. She leaned forward and gave Narcissa a sharp slap across her cheek and Narcissa whimpered, burying her face in Andromeda's skirts. Andromeda looked up at her older sister, and now there was curiosity written all over her face.

"In love? With who?"

"I am _not_ in love!" Bellatrix protested. "How can you even _begin_ to think that – my _God_, do you think I'm really that weak and that- that stupid?" She couldn't recall being so furious in a very long time and if she had been a more introspective sort of girl, she might have stopped to consider just _why_ the idea of her being in love enraged her so.

"You _are_," Narcissa protested, her voice muffled in Andromeda's thigh. "You're in love with–"

"You keep your mouth _shut!_" Bellatrix snarled so viciously that Narcissa fell silent instantly. "You don't know _anything_, you _stupid_ little girl – I am _not _in love and how _dare_ you suggest–"

"Who is it, Bellatrix?" Andromeda asked, raising her voice into a sweetly mocking tone. "Who is it that you're in love with? Not Rodolphus – Rabastan, maybe? You're wasting your time on him, darling – he wouldn't fancy you…"

"I don't want anything to do with Rabastan!" Bellatrix snapped. "He's a stupid, useless, cowardly little thing and I wouldn't kiss him if you paid me a thousand galleons for it–"

"It's Lucius," Narcissa said, then squealed when Bellatrix grabbed a handful of her hair and yanked her up by it. Tears sprung to Narcissa's large, pale eyes and she struggled against her sister's tight grip.

"_What_ did you say?" Bellatrix hissed. Her voice was low and dangerous and Narcissa would have had to be profoundly stupid to protest that she hadn't said anything.

"Lucius," she squeaked. "You're in love with Lucius Malfoy – and don't you try to tell us otherwise!" she added with a bit of a triumphant note in her voice. "Don't even try – I saw you and him–"

"You saw me and him doing _what_?" Bellatrix snarled. She lowered her voice to a soft, dangerous snarl. "You saw me and him doing what, you stupid little spying bitch – what did you see?" She shook her sister roughly by her long, pale hair. "Answer me now!"

"M- making–"

"Making- making love–"

Bellatrix's face went crimson and she dropped her sister as though she had burned herself. Andromeda's eyes widened and she put her arm in front of Narcissa to protect her.

"Oh, Bella, you _didn't–_"

"Of course I didn't!" Bellatrix almost sounded a bit hysterical and her breast heaved. It seemed to be difficult for her to get the words out. "I- I would never- _Lucius Malfoy_, Narcissa, what would I want with that preening peacock of a man – _good God_, he's practically a girl! With his hair and his robes and he spends more time in front of a mirror than any of us do – do you think I'd ever want a man like him?"

"You seemed like you wanted him." Narcissa sounded a bit braver with Andromeda's protection. "You seemed like you wanted him an _awful_ lot when you two were in bed together…"

"We _never_ did _any_ such thing!"

"Yes, you did! I saw you after the solstice party–"

Bellatrix sprung to her feet and backed away slowly. Her face was flushed deep red.

"I'm not going to listen to this," she snarled. "I am _not_ going to listen to my _stupid_ little sisters making accusations about my sex life – completely _false_ ones!" she added sharply. "You two don't know anything. I'm not in love, least of all with Lucius, and – and I'm thrilled to be marrying Rodolphus!" she added, though that was the most profound of lies. Andromeda snorted a little and Bellatrix growled through her teeth at her before turning and flouncing up to her dormitory.

Lucius was – _of course_ – standing outside her dormitory with an infuriating little smirk on his face.

"Not in love with me, are you?" he said, his voice low and velvety and full of mirth. Bellatrix glared at him, clenching her hands into fists until she felt her long nails breaking the skin.

"No, you arrogant little prat," she snapped coldly. "No, I'm not in love with you. This isn't love, what you and I have. It's sex. Don't try to make it any more complicated than that."

"Fine. If it's not any more complicated than sex…" He stood up, already undoing the buttons on his shirt and Bellatrix made a _tsk_ noise, pushing him away.

"I'm not exactly in the mood for that right now."

"Right." His voice was taking on a slightly bitter tone. "All right. If you're not in the mood for nice, uncomplicated sex, then let's have a nice, uncomplicated discussion where you answer one very simple question for me. You can do that, can't you, Bella?"

"Of course," she said impatiently. "What's your question, then?"

"Is it true that you and Rodolphus are getting married?"

Bellatrix had been all ready to give him a sharp, snappish retort, but all words died in her throat. Lucius was not a blunt man – he preferred to skirt around a point with double entendre and allusion and wait until whoever he was trying to question snapped and told him whatever he wanted to know without him even needing to ask. Asking a question so simple as _is it true that you and Rodolphus are getting married_ was unusual for him and Bellatrix would have been lying if she said that she didn't feel a bit of a tightening in her chest at the sound of his voice. She almost felt sorry for him.

"Yes," she said quietly. She tried to soften the blow of the words with a quiet tone, but she knew that it wouldn't do any real good – it never did. "He and I are getting married."

"Right." Lucius swallowed hard and she saw his Adam's apple bob in his throat. "Right. I should have known that it would happen sooner or later – it's not as if you haven't had a string of suitors noticing you for long enough…"

"I wasn't exactly expecting it either," Bellatrix said, a bit more snappishly than she had meant to. "Really, Lucius – you can't think that I would get married to Rodolphus if I had a choice… I mean, he's so _boring_… only ever talks about politics and about his brother…"

"It'll be like being married to two men at once," Lucius said with a little smirk. "You and Rodolphus and Rabastan – I would have thought that you'd like that."

Bellatrix snorted. "Don't be stupid, Lucius. I'd rather be dead than married to both of them – it's bad enough that I'll be married to one…"

"I don't suppose there's any way that you could get out of it…?" Lucius asked thoughtfully. "There has _got_ to be something that would convince your parents that you and Rodolphus can't get married."

"If I got pregnant by another man – that might do it," Bellatrix said, and then shuddered when Lucius looked at her questioningly. "Don't even _think_ of it, Lucius! I'm not going to get pregnant _on purpose_ on the off chance that my parents would decide that that was reason enough not to marry me off…"

"Why not?" The look on Lucius's face made her squirm. It was as though he really thought that it would be a good idea. "Then you and I could get married – and we wouldn't even have to worry about having a child right away. We'd have a head start–"

Bellatrix snorted. "That's a terrible idea, Lucius. You know as well as I that they'd just have the marriage happen even sooner and try to pass it off as Rodolphus's child."

Lucius didn't say anything for a long time, then raised his shoulder in a slight shrug. "All right. Fine. If you don't care about me enough–"

"You should have _known_ that I wouldn't care about you – about this – enough!" Bellatrix snapped. "Because I'm _not_ in love with you, Lucius – how many times do I have to explain this? I sleep with you. There's a difference between that and love."

"Right," he said quietly. "Fine. I understand."

"Good."

And that was the end of the discussion for that night. It was, in fact, the end of all discussion between the two of them on the topic of Bellatrix's marriage at all, and that was, she thought, for the better. Marriage was a difficult subject to speak about even in the best of situations, and what she had with Lucius was certainly not the best of situations. She tried her hardest to keep the matter unmentioned when she went to bed with him, and when they lay in bed afterwards, she would pretend to fall asleep quickly so that she wouldn't have to say anything more to him. It was easier to keep silent.

When Lucius's engagement to Narcissa was announced – just weeks before Bellatrix's wedding to Rodolphus – she glared at him while he talked to Cygnus and arranged the dowry that Narcissa would receive. More than once, she thought that she caught his eye and that he _might_ have given her just the tiniest of self-satisfied smirks.

_The bastard._

She caught his arm when he was leaving the house after telling her family that he would be taking her youngest sister away, and she pushed him roughly against the wall outside.

"What do you think you're playing at?" she hissed. "Is this revenge, is it? You're going to try to make me feel the same way that you did by sleeping with my sister?"

"Of course not," he said, all calm composure. "Really, Bellatrix, what _must_ you think of me? Do you _truly_ think that I would stoop that low?"

"Yes," she hissed. "Yes, I do. I know that you would." Her nails dug into his shoulders and she hoped that it was hurting him. If it was, he was remarkably good at keeping his face straight and devoid of pain.

"Let's say," he said, "for the sake of argument, that I am. Let's say that I really _am_ trying to get _revenge_ on you for running off with Rodolphus. If that _was_ the case, then what would you think of me? You wouldn't be very pleased, would you?" And when she didn't answer, he brought one arm up and grabbed a hank of her hair, yanking on it. "_Would you_, you little whore? You'd be pretty damn angry, wouldn't you?"

"Get _off!_" She slapped his hand away. "All right, you've played your little game, you've made me pay – what are you going to do now? You're really going to marry Narcissa for _revenge_ when the revenge won't even do any good? I mean, for God's sake, Lucius – I can't break the engagement with Rodolphus off now! I never could, or I would have!"

He didn't say anything. The two of them stared at each other for a long time, both fuming, both _daring_ the other to say another word, then Lucius pressed his mouth against Bellatrix's and kissed her more roughly than he ever had before and Bellatrix found herself responding. She pulled on the buttons of his shirt and yanked at his trousers and then she was pinned against the wall with her skirts up around her hips and his whole body was pressing against her and she could only moan and arch her back while he pounded against her so roughly that tears – _only of pain, _she told herself,_ only a simple, physical reaction, not of emotion at all_ – poured down her cheeks.

She tried not to think that a little pain couldn't cause her to sob like that.

When Lucius was done and pulled back, smoothing down her skirt for her, and she looked up at him with wide and teary eyes, she saw that his cheeks were wet as well.

"I fucking love you, Black," he said, and his voice cracked a bit.

Bellatrix made a soft noise in her throat. She didn't know how to properly respond, what to say – it was all so damn stupid and awful and _wrong_ and she hated it. She didn't want to be married to Rodolphus and she didn't want Lucius to marry Narcissa, but she didn't want – _couldn't want, not really_ – to marry Lucius either. She didn't want the basis for her marriage to be like this, all about pain and lust and animalistic roughness…

_Because that would be wrong._

"We can't _ever_ do this again," was all she said, and Lucius didn't protest.

He didn't say a word either, when, nine months later and long after Bellatrix's marriage to Rodolphus, Narcissa came home from visiting her sister in tears and said that Bellatrix had suffered a stillbirth.

"She had a beautiful baby," she sobbed, falling into Lucius's arms and crying into his shoulder. "A beautiful blonde baby boy…"

Lucius said nothing.

The stillbirth became a secret, just as everything between him and Bellatrix had been.

)O(

_Fin_


End file.
